Confused

I was so sure summer was over.  I was wrong.  After only two or three days of cool weather, the heat has come back full force and now at the end of August it is hotter than it was in June and July.  Does that mean September is going to be the new July in Korea?  I hope not, I hope September brings cool weather.  I do not want to wait for the fall equinox to begin before I can start feeling the seasonal coolness I love so much.  I think I have been a good girl, so don’t I deserve an early fall?

But really, my body cannot take anymore of this heat.  I have rashes all up and down my arms and legs.  The heat keeps it going.  Sweat and water and heat.  My eczema was beginning to clear up because of those few cool days, but now they are spreading like a zombie virus.  I feel like I want to peel my skin off I am so hot.

This is how I sleep at night: no blanket, lying on a cool mat (yeah it is cool in the beginning but the longer you lay on it, the warmer it becomes, so totally not effective!), with two fans blowing on me. Even with that, I am still hot.  Oh how I long for America and air conditioning.  Our ac here is a tall fridge like machine that sits in the living room and it is broken.

My husband ordered me some California Baby products to help with my eczema.  We ordered the Calendula shampoo and body wash as well as some Calendula lotion.  Calendula i.e. pot marigold is supposed to be the best herb for skin irritations like cradle cap, rash, eczema, and acne.  Since I am a strong believer in herbal remedies and since I have seen way too many doctors here and they could not help my eczema, I am so praying that the calendula works.

I have been a little bit depressed recently, not because of the heat.  I don’t know I have a paradox.  I want to make more money, because we need to have lots of money saved up for our move back to the states and let’s face it that just isn’t happening.  I want to, I need to make more money, but I just don’t want to work.  I am already feeling stressed about my tutoring job,  My group of 7 year olds are not being on their best behavior as of late.  And even my other young students are working me into a tizzy.  I just want to have a job where I can work from home, do something I love like sewing and crochet.  But I guess I need to advertise about that a little bit more, maybe even try to sell some things on etsy.  I still dream about being a published author one day, but how can that happen when I never write.  I start stories and they never get finished.  What kind of writer does this?  Not a very good one I guess.

I feel like writing again.  Perhaps September should be writing month.  I should write at least 10 pages a day everyday this month.  And if I have some time left over than I can work on some crafts.  Why is it, every time I see that someone my age is published or getting published, it puts me into writing mode.  Maybe it is because I am competitive.  Really didn’t think I was, but that makes sense.  I get easily jealous and want to be great at what other people are beginning to be great at.

Now I have it in my head that I want to start a humorous blog/comic.  I have been reading a lot of them lately and have decided that “Hey I want to do that too!”

“I want to get popular and become a professional blogger!”

As it stands now, I want to

A)    Be a professional crafter; sewing, crocheting, and knitting

B)    Be a published author

C)    Be a mommy

D)    Become a famous blogger

E)     Become a mommy   ß I really want this

F)     Make Money

G)    Not have a job, but still make money!

H)    Not get stressed while making money

Now if only I can accomplish all these things.

Anyway, this blog will be packed full of crafts, writing projects (maybe), humor with pictures (if I can ever learn how to draw) Honey Bunny said he would teach me how to use Photoshop.  But I really can’t draw so I don’t know how using Photoshop will make me more artistically inclined.  As it stands now, all I can draw are stick figures.  Using Photoshop I am sure I will only be able to draw stick figures albeit a bit squiggly because I can’t for the life of me draw a straight line using the computer mouse.

Now I have talked to my Honey Bunny, (or Honey Rooster – I don’t know he likes roosters) about my crazy humor blog idea and he has promised that if I can write something really funny he will draw for me.  The only problem is now that I have decided to add humor posts to my blog, I can’t think of anything funny to write.

There are just so many creative and hilarious bloggers out there.  Take for instance Allie of Hyperbole and a Half.  Now she is hilarious and I love reading her blog.  But, there is no way I can ever be as great as these bloggers.  I guess if the comic fails, I can fall back on the craft part of my blog.